He's almost to the finish line.

Well, we are mere days away, not even a full week, from my little brother from another mother's release.

I could not be happier that JJ's about to get the cluck out of here, but also, color me worried. I really want him gone, like I want most people serving time to be, but I want to also be there for him when he needs help! Being here means I am not there, and he's going out into the brave new yard with all of its noises and smells.

I know he has a road ahead of him to travel, whether he stays here in Florida, or moves on to the Western States (where an adult can be an adult, not a past label), and I wish him all the success he can scratch up out of the dirt from whence he came.

He's younger than I by over a decade, but he's older than the main age cutoff for Job Corps, which is where I firmly believe he needs to be. With a clinically diagnosed learning disability on board, I believe he gets to bypass that main age cutoff. He does not have a murder charge on board, which I believe means he should not be disqualified for having a conviction and having served time in prison. He needs, NEEDS a High School Diploma or equivalent instrument, which the Job Corps I remember helps attendants to earn in addition to a trade. To get help in this next leg of his journey, that is, the help that the Blessington Correctional and Rehabilitation Facility failed to offer him (and to many, many others) would benefit him positively and help to keep him from becoming another negative data point in the prison statistics.

I don't want to see him again, not while I'm in prison.
But I DO want to eat a veggie deluxe pizza with him once I get out.

I know I have not, but.

If anything, I am swallowing my feelings of failing him.
I'm coating those feelings with the medicines of:

I do not have Internet access, so I cannot directly research the things he needs. I have provided him with places to look for help on the outside, and knowledge of the 211 Network, which provides help for those in need.
I do not have the financial wherewithal to help bootstrap him when he leaves this weekend. The places I've told him to look for can connect him to Navigators and services that will help him move forward.
I did take time to work with him on his emotional responses, and he has benefited from someone he trusts modeling a better behavioral response to scenarios that bother him. He is much calmer as result.
I know he is needing education. I've mentioned the work centers across the USA that will have Navigators that help him find resources to increase his employability.

I worry about him, but I also do not worry.
For him to have survived four years of abject terrorism in the hands of the state, I know he is a lot stronger than he looks.

He'll just benefit from some big, healthy meals when he's free again. :)

Fair winds, little JJ. We'll have pizza some day. :)

Jayel